Uncured Pepperoni Thin & Crispy Pizza

Pietro Pasquale of Suzzi, Sicily, had nine beautiful daughters and one pathetic son named Pepe. Pietro doted on his bellisimi daughters who were divine cooks, magnificent musicians and peerless students. Pepe couldn’t cook, play an instrument or pass fourth grade. One day, while his sisters were at the beauty parlor, Pepe snuck into the kitchen where he was never allowed, and seeing all the baskets of succulent vegetables, cheeses, salamis and condiments, he was suddenly seized with an uncontrollable urge to cook. He twirled around the kitchen in a frenzy, grabbing flour, cheeses, pepperoni, mushrooms and vegetables, blended them in a pan, shoved it in the oven. Ecco! A delicious pie that didn’t have the heavy, gushy crust and gooey topping like his sisters’. When they came home they laughed at Pepe’s pizza but after they sampled a piece (pezza) they begged for more! Word spread and people from all over Sicily and beyond came to devour Pepe’s pizza. His words of wisdom are engraved on Suzzi’s City Hall: “More top, less bottom.” In 1804, Pep was awarded the Nobel Prize for culinary invention and herewith we present his pizza made from the very recipe he divulged in his Nobel acceptance speech.